Does my child have ADHD?

This is a very personal post from me so please be patient as I muddle through this post. You see I became a mum at the young age of 17 and since then I have tried to break every stigma off being a teen mum. I forced my self through university and working along side that, I missed so many important things and tried to be a better role model for my son. I wanted life to be different I wanted a different circumstance. I remember reading alot of things in the media and this was one I could never really get over:

Children of young mums are likely to have behavioural problems growing up. 

I have tried for years to ignore this, not let it take hold. My son who is now nine is not always the perfect behaved child and often far from it. You see when your a young teen mum there is a lot of judgement upon you, its hard to go to toddler groups especially with an hyperactive child. You feel peoples eyes are on you and the way you parent. Thankfully I have grown out of this and now am with two more children later a bit more relaxed with that side of it all.

Lately the term special needs has been coming up, I for one knows how this feels it was certainly my own primary school experience sitting on the "special" table because I couldn't write well or work like the other kids. It turned out I was dyslexia and dispraxic something that didn't get picked up till I was at uni. They first mentioned ADHD when my son was in reception, but then I ignored it.  Said I didn't want my child labelled and just said it was his way of adjusting to school. As the years went on he settled and seemed to be coming along well. It wasn't till the end of year 3 term where everything just seemed to be falling apart.

The school called me in for a meeting to discuss my Sons behaviour and how they suspected something, they said he was a bright child who if he carries on the way he is will fall behind. Was such a massive blow there was me in a bubble thinking he was doing ok then they drop all this on me. My son who at home isn't always an angel but is lovely turns out to be this disruptive, rude and uninterested child. See my son he is very bright he isn't a fool. It made my heart sink and the next few steps were put into place regarding assessment of hid behaviour.

Nothing much has come since then just an observation from the school. His behaviour just seems to be getting more and more odd, he can't seem to control his emotions. Sometimes now at home, its like he can't calm down always on the go,  never stimulated unless playing a video game. He can be mean to kids and unsympathetic to others. It makes me wonder where my little boy has gone? how have I let him grow up like this? I have tried everything to try and stop it. We get regular phone calls and I dread school pick ups. Its an tough time at the moment. See he is pleasant at home and it pains me. I want to shake him tell him he is making all the wrong choices, I want to tell him how much it saddens me. I want to tell him he has such an amazing future ahead. Its hard. really hard.

The school think its possibly aspergers syndrome / adhd which I am happy to accept but its taking so long to sort anything out. I want the help there that he so needs. I want to get the phone calls for good behaviour. He defiantly has it in him but he can not control it. They keep him at computer tie at lunchtime now too, like an caged animal. It makes me feel so sad, even writing this now. He hates school and we are torn.

Until then we continue as we are, praising him for the good. Pulling out the gold in him. Encouraging the best bits. Trying to not be so disheartened on the bad days and enjoying the good.

If you have any experience in this then please let me know what your experiences are?

How can I break bad habits in children - nail biting

Well it's embarrassing to say I bite my nails, it's been a bad habit since I was a child. My own mother tried to get me to stop with such sayings as "people who bite there nails are weak" or "you will bite your fingers off" yeah good one mum those motivational talks really helped.

So with that I now have 2 children that bite there nails! Argh 2! My eldest Asti's nails are bitten so low with him we have tried so much. That nail biting stuff that tastes yuck but it still didn't stop. I kind of forgot about it as it wasn't a massive thing. Until yesterday I noticed my 2 year old chomping her nails! Argh 2 didn't know that is possible!

Even worse I caughter her trying to bite her toe nails! Surely that is even worse right? Oh dear what am I going to do? I have never been able to not bite my nails, I have tried most things. I do not want my children to face the same problems. See I told you my mother said I would be weak. I am a fidget you see, I spent my whole uni life ripping paper to keep my focus. I  have to have something in my hands otherwise I am lost that is why I bite my nails.

SO how am I going to break the habit? Its awful seeing your 8 and 2 year old biting there nails. Especilly as they do not always have the cleanest hands. maybe its a good thing for the old immune system. If you have any tips then please HELP.

The fate of our nails depend on it.

(ok this is not the most interesting post of the day bur hey ho thats being a parent, its not all coffee and cake its this too, sorry about that) 

Siblings - Feb 2015

You see my kids hate having their photos together, I do not know what there issue is maybe its the fact that there is 3 or just they just want to play or in this months photos cry in Little Bears case. I tried to get out to get some nice pictures of the three of them together but Pants wanted to play football and Ami was happy to play in the park, this left Little Bear who cried the whole time unhappy to be out in the cold I think!

This month we have seen a little bond growing between Ami and Little Bear, they have been playing more and although there playing involves knocking each other over they have been having a laugh. Little Bear has started to say a few words and it has been lovely seeing Ami encourage him to talk, deffo a highlight when she understood what he was saying and she was so pleased. She still loves Pants and as you can see from the photos below how happy she was for him to play with her on the big swing. My three little children. all so different, all so determined, all so lovely.

So here is our sibling Photos for this months.

You know your a parent when....

1. You stand Rocking, even if your not holding a baby? Whats with that!
2. You enjoy having a wee in peace. 
3. Counting down the time till dinner time as its close to bedtime.
4. You find yourself buying your child lego and insisting you build it.
5. You Spend the evening watching loom band videos online to be able to teach your child in the morning
6. You cut your toddlers food into funky shapes to find they only throw it on the floor.
7. You get a liking to luke warm tea. 
8. Then you only get to drink half that cup anyway!
9. You manage to break free from the children to find they have stuck a sticker/ stickers on you without you noticing.
10. 7:00am is a big lie-in
11. You buy a sweet treat and keep it hidden from the kids as they will devour it in no time at all (my husband hides Krave in the airing cupboard) 
12. When you find the tap running in the bathroom and wonder how much has been wasted.
13. Looking for the tv controller for hours to find it hidden in a shoe.
14. You secretly hoover up lego/ small toys
15. Your searching in the dark for a dummy trying not to wake the baby even more

Have you any traits you have acquired since becoming a parent? 

Guest Post: 5 Ways to Make a Child’s Bedroom More Exciting

5 Ways to Make a Child’s Bedroom More Exciting 

Keeping children entertained can be a constant concern for parents, especially if they’re below school age or off for the holidays. One good way to occupy them is to invest in an appealing and exciting bedroom for them to play in. With this, you can relax yourself or get on with the daily chores knowing your child is safe and content in their room.

There are many style tips you can implement for the bedroom but you should bear in mind the appeal for your child in contrast to their age and interests. If you’re thinking of a revamp in this area, here are five tips to help you get going.

Focus on the Bed

The bed is the most important furniture aspect to consider; after all, it will be used every day by your child and is crucial for a good night’s sleep. There are many types of model to choose from, from traditional country and divan beds through to more adventurous cabin or loft beds. These latter types can be more appealing to youngsters due to their elevated frame and possible features incorporated underneath, such as a wardrobe or desk.

You can find lots of different styles of beds for children here at KidsBedsOnline

Consider the Layout

Children of course have a lot of spare energy and will appreciate a larger floor space in their bedrooms to play in. Think about where furniture items are positioned to create as much room as possible, this will allow children to play with their toys in the bedroom and reduce the chance of accidents happening also. Beds with storage space fitted into them can help with this.

There are great free tools to plan room layouts online; there is a great list of the best ones at Freshome.

Create a Games Area

Modern day kids are treated with a whole host of electronic items to absorb themselves in, from computer consoles and TV’s to laptops and tablets. If they’re of suitable age, you should create a safe area for them to play with their electronic items. Make the seating area comfortable and also ensure their necks don’t have to strain to view the TV. Wiring needs to be protected, untangled and covered if possible so any accidents don’t happen.

Check out the two new consoles doing battle this Christmas (if your children are old enough!) here:

·         Sony Playstation 4

·         Microsoft X-Box One

Decorate Smartly

Of course, a dull and lifeless room will not appeal to children at all so think how decorating can create a more welcoming atmosphere. Use bright and simple colours on walls and floors, adding matching pictures or mats if desired. If your child has a certain interest or hobby – i.e. a favourite football team for a young boy – then use posters of their star players or football-themed wallpaper, lampshades, etc to make the room enjoyable to be in.

Take Advantage of their Creative Side

Children develop a lot of different interests when they’re young. You should provide the tools for them to harness these interests in their bedroom. Fitting in a desk for them to complete homework and use their computer are advisable for example, whilst a corkboard also allows them to stick important notes to the wall. Musical instruments are another good idea, both as a way to keep kids engaged and enhance their creative intuitions.

You can find a whole host of creative ideas for children by searching Pinterest’s DIY & Craft section.

When coming to decorate your child’s bedroom, think of the ways they will benefit from the positioning of furniture and the design of the room. Create space for them to play in whilst also reserving an area for them to complete homework tasks. Don’t forget to ask your child’s input as ultimately their opinion should be the most important. 

The end of maternity leave..

So Ive done it now gone back to work! wasnt as sad as i though it may be, in fact felt like normal heading towards the hospital im based at! Although was extremely rusty when going back and the fact i was working with peads instead of adults was a little daunting! I have loved being back at work, Ive had plenty of cups of tea and even an hour lunch break! what luxury!

Also knowing Ami was being looked after was great, my sister, mum and husband have done a great job so far! I also have more energy must be my brain ticking over again and realising I love nursing and missed it! I even got let home early to put Ami to bed she was upset and cheered right up when she saw me! That was nice its usually the other way round when my husband returns from work! Im currently working long days 7:30 to 8:30 13 hours miss the children days!

Heres some tips for going back to work

1) be comfortable with your childcare, there is nothing worse than knowing your child is upset or not being looked after how you want! I have been there in the past with dodgy childminders and its so much better when you know they are looked after well!

2) Dont push your self! A year of after having a baby is tough on your brain! Well it is in an environment where policies are always changing!

3) Dont worry about calling to find out how they are doing, if its every hour dont worry it will take a load of your chest! I called alot just to find out how Ami was doing I had never left her for that long before!

4) Enjoy the breaks! Dont feel guilty about having a break enjoy it whilst you have peace!

5) Remember soon a day of where you and your child will enjoy each others company! Its nice to be apart makes you appreciate each other more when home!



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My week so Far. We love the sunshine!

Sorry have been very quiet as of late my sister borrowed my laptop and couldn't get blogger to work on my phone (what a wally)!  anyway we have had a very good week, not done alot but enjoyed Mr sunshine! 

Monday we saw my sister and her two boys they had been to wrestle mania so was full of stories about wrestling Pants loved to hear! i heard all about the fights then we often had to stop all the boys from acting the moves out on each other! 

Tuesday me and Ami had a picnic before getting Pants then we went to the beach that's at the end of our road! it was Amis first experience of Sand she loved it and was very curious, she liked the texture in her hands! Pants took of to the sea were he attempted to swim in the nice chilly April water but it didn't stop him! he came back soaking but happy! Ami even made it to a paddle it was nice i had briefly forgotten about warmer weather! 

 

Wednesday was more chilled the sun was out briefly me and Ami went for another picnic but the weather turned cloudy so we headed home, i got changed into less summery clothes for the school run didn't want to be cold but then was boiling had to take tights of in school toilets lol! We also saw my mum who has recently  started a new job and said because we hadn't seen us lately shed take us to tesco and Mac Donald's (very random but that is my mum, shes always like it)! Also had our first cafe Church had a guest speaker called Carl Willis he was really good! was really refreshing night!

Thursday (today) we help out at the toddler group held at our church! i sit in the baby area with my good friend Leanne were not much use but i suppose were there! then my husband took me out for lunch we went and sat on a prom were he tested out some kit he had made for his camera! some kind of slide thing to do with getting a steady shot (must listen more) ! Then me Pants and Ami went to the beach! Pants wanted to go crabbing but we didnt find any crabs must be too cold still! Ami was a pain today on the beach she kept on eating the sand and being a pickle about it so put her in the pushchair, she kicked of big time but i remember pants as a baby eating sand then we were up A & E because he was so poorly! Chucked the kids in the bath and of out i was again (two nights in a row) been doing a course about Prophesy at a local church, been interesting! 

So what sounded like a quiet week in my head now looks busy! loving the warmer weather sad its going back to normal tomorrow! we have a spring ball tomorrow at our church very interesting not sure what to expect but it will be good fun i bet!

Me and my bubba bear

mothers Day

I do love Mothers Day!  i don't see it as another excuse to say thank you but a day to honor our mothers and other mothers who need to be reminded that they are awesome! ive been blessed with two Children and iam so so thankful for both! each in there own way make me smile! each in there own way make me frustrated! but i love them both the same!

This morning i got woken by my husband (i was awake before hand but was doing the usual battle of who is up first to get the baby). he had made me a cup of tea! way hay! and then some flowers and a card made by Aston! i think he was trying hard because he forgot (he said he was getting the card later)  so he was trying harder! he had got me some flowers which was lovely!

We then went to church where they had laid on a cream tea for all the mothers which was nice! And they also dis something called a fire tunnel kind of like at then end of a wedding when the couple leave a wedding but praying for all the mums that where there! it was good! my mother also came so it was nice to hang with her and she enjoyed playing with Ami! we had got her some shoes from m and s!
Pants also let me have control of the tv for a few hours in which we watched Matilda! he really enjoyed it now wants to see the live show! maybe one day!

Although alday Ami has been teeth and has had about 20 mins sleep! even as i write this she is crying away in her cot! darn teeth! hopefully they will just pop through!

Happy mothers day everyone!

Pants Card he made at school!

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Reasons to be cheerful week 2!

Reasons to be cheerful!

1) i have a lovely family who always make me laugh

2) finally brought some new clothes means im starting to shift this baby weight!

3) Ami has been sleeping through the night!

i have plenty more but its funny as soon as you sit to write them down suddenly they go from my head!



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minecraft mum! the joys of modern motherhood

I’ve become a minecraft mum! not only do i have to endure hours of listening to boring minecraft videos I’ve sometimes found myself actually playing it on pants iPod when he’s in bed! I don’t get the game you build houses, although i hear a lot about full armour oh dear…. Even sheep and also there’s tons YouTube videos of songs people have made up about minecraft even a Harlem shake one!

It’s sad because pants who is six is better at computer stuff than me! And I’ve got my European computer driving licence... (Ok i failed it 4 times but i got there in the end) this was a mandatory course for any student nurse to take (yes because Ram is important to patient care)! It was all about ram whatever that is! I must keep up to date with it! In order to watch and help and make sure he is safe playing these games!

another thing when he goes on my laptop now he’s older he can read whereas before i could leave it on cebeebies and he would stay on that site but now he wonders to sites like Tesco, asda and even eBay where he bided £250 for an arsenal kit! Oh dear! But the funny thing is i never taught him how to use a laptop i assume he had learnt it at school! Will have to put parent safety on not sure how too lol!

What are your thoughts about modern technology and children?

Reasons to be cheerfull 1,2,3 W1

I saw this on a blog thought it was a great idea! in life its very easy to focus on the negatives and forget the great things that happen! 

1) i watched a program on BB1 called Mary and Martha, this program was about two mothers who lost there children to malaria. it made my cry through out but made me realise how privileged i am and that i dont have to worry about those things for my children! i hope to see in my lifetime this completely eradicated! catch it on Iplayer!

2) we went to Disneyland in friday

3) my friends just brought me flowers and creme eggs to cheer me up!

being a mum

Some days i just love being a mum, i love everything about it! School runs also! but other days i could easily hop on a plane go somewhere hot! some days it can be a relief just to go to work! although i haven't been to work for 8months as on maternity leave! am actually looking forward to going back! i was chatting to some mum friends of mine and they were saying that they liked work as they get an hour break and no changing nappies or looking after someone! i thought lucky them i go to work do exactly what i do at home but on a adult scale! the highlights of being a nurse!

Anyway I do love my children very much they cause me much delight! they are both so different and funny! Pants is very outgoing, very noisy, cheeky but defiantly not boring! very clever not sure where he got that from! its sad when a 6 year old has to show you how to do things on a ipod! and Ami just as sweet shes just starting to develop a personality she already seems very chilled out very much like her dad!

my day goes like this wake up to either husbands alarm/ Ami crying/ pants shoving ipod in my face asking me to download him a game! i then get Ami feed her whilst trying to get my husband to wake up so i don't have to quickly make the packed lunches  or the forcing pants to get dressed bribeing him with nuttella on toast as a reward for getting dressed! by this time Ami is bored of staying in bed! wants to explore elsewhere so of we go into our lounge! i then pick up the carnage from pants! and my husband takes pants to school! most days something is forgotten book bag/lunch box/ scooter!
this is all before 9am

what joy but then i wouldnt change it! ive been a mum since i was a teenager its all ive known i never had those care free years of being an adult, spending all day in bed! not having to sort childcare out if i want to do anything on my own!  that's the dream! one day when the kids are adults i shall have my time then! i plan to do alot of missionary work maybe we will take the kids with us! i dont know what the future holds but i do know god has some awesome plans for us! so if were still blogging i hope you enjoy the ride!


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