If you have ever been to a soft play area as a child or with your child you will know they are a place where time stands still. Minutes seem to last ages and you want to make your money's worth but going up and down the same slide 150 times in a row is enough for the hard core mums and dads. So here's is a little list of do's and dont's when it comes to soft play areas.
Do get your self a nice hot tea.
Don't be prepared to drink it as your child wants you by there side the whole time
Do remember socks bonus for matching pair.
Don't forget to check for holes as nothing like the embarrassment of a sticking out toe.
Do go with friends.
Don't think you will have the chance to talk to them as your children go in different directions.
Do remember to ask child if they need a wee regularly.
Don't let a child leave your site when starting potty training as experience tells me you will find said child bare bottomed and the knickers and trousers striped of due to toddler tiddling in the bool pool (the shame).
Do invite friends it's much nicer to have company at these places.
Don't forget your children to find them drinking fruit shoots that arnt there's.
Do make the most of going through the soft play
Don't let little kids boss you around when your at the top, you go down the slide on your terms your a adult, ok I do what they say.
Do make the most of the deals such as free Lunch and play.
Don't go in school holidays as you will pay a small fortune to be pushed around by older kids it's not fun at all.
Do find out the wifi so you can browse social media whilst wanting to blow your brains.
Don't think your kids will let you sit down for longer than 2 minutes.
Do watch out for toddler scraps.
Don't bet on which child will come out worse.
Do jump in the ball pool you are never to old for that.
Don't get caught by the soft play bandits or worse throw a ball and it hits another child Doh.
Do try to race down the slides with he kids.
Don't forget the kids and leave an afraid toddler at the top of the slide screaming. Then don't walk away like its not your kid (thats never happened I promise).
Do take plenty of photos especially ball pools they are always good ones.
Don't forget to look out for the photo bombing gran trying to get into every pic, oye love I don't know you get out my pictures.
Do make the most of the whole time to make he most of e expensive entrance fees.
Don't fall asleep in a dark place to find your kids back on that table trying to steal other kids fruit shoots.
Do smile friendly at other adults, make sympathetic faces when there kid tantrums over not going on the Peppa pig machine.
Don't get caught staring or looking smug because remember toddlers and kids are like time bombs it could be you next.
Do tell your child that all machines are broken.
Don't start buying the snacks as before you know it they have had cakes ice creams and the idea to not spend loads has gone out the window, all that money could have gone in the peppa pig machine for 5 mins peace.
Do enjoy soft play its a lot more fun when you get stuck in although only the other day I got caught climbing up a step monkey rope thing at digged into my feet if kids weren't around I would have swore all the way up the sodding rope.
If you have endured soft play what are your do's and Dont's.